Today is a sad day as I have just learnt that the Conservative Society at my first university has closed due to a lack of members. In its heyday, the society was one of the strongest on campus despite regular political persecution from the corrupt students' union and the retarded Jew-hating Stalinist "Fuzzy" Helen Watters. Indeed, it was the only party political society in Lampeter, usually numbering over 20 members out of a student body over just over 1,000. There were attempts by Fuzzy and the infamous Jo Salmon with her then-lackey James Insley to set up rival groups (the Liberal Democrats and Left of Centre respectively), but these never got off the ground despite the number of left-wing dummies such Alex Staniforth and Tom O'Leary that were prominent on campus.
Unfortunately, when the old guard such as founder Andrew Rose, the jolly Oliver Owen and myself left Lampeter, the group lost its biggest assets for attracting new members and thus ran out of steam. The society had its ups and downs, but my miserable time at Lampeter would have been far worse without it. I miss Andy, Ole, Charlie Notton, Elliot Moreland and the rest. Heck, I even miss part-time member Neil Vaughan and we hate each other. Out of the old crew, I am only still in touch Andy and I still have Neil's mobile phone number and email address. I wish I could get back contact with all the others.
No doubt that obese cretin and pervert of a Pro-Vice Chancellor "Dirty" Barry Burnham is jumping for joy. I hope the Reichsmarshal chokes to death on his own blubber.